June 30, 2012
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Rambles from me..
Deep in contemplation.. Wishing on a star.. Wondering why some people are just meant to live a life of emotional pain.
Feeling so alone the body aches for something real. Not just the intimate way, but in the human way. Connections are important to all of us,
mental and physical. We ache intimately to touch & feel what is real. You can feel alone even in a crowded room of people you know. So used to
hearing only lip service, seems as though nothing (no one) is real. Burned, scared so much, the scales have tipped to the ‘never trust’ side.
Nothing is easy, life is one hell of a ride that’s for sure. Is that friendship an illusion or is it truth? What really lies behind that face?
As I look in the mirror, seeing my reflection, I contemplate. Am I noticed, or am I invisible? Would anyone even miss me if I leave, or go?
Does it even matter? I guard myself. I built walls, yes, to protect & guard my feelings. I cannot tear them down not for just anyone.
Trust is a huge issue with me. I can name only one person who knows me completely. So I stroll on through with humor, sarcasm,
and deep down that loneliness claws at me like a wolf to a first kill.. aching to feel alive..
